Return home!

I made a whirlwind trip this weekend and am back home. I went and spent some serious time (ie: more than 1 hour) in my hometown, Cedar Falls, IA. It's still weird to look around at things when you're at an adult height. Nothing is as imposing or scary. Everything is cardboard, cookiecutter, just like you left it. (My neighborhood there was built in the 1970s). There's the weird memories of learning how to swim, seeing your elementary school, driving by the old track. There's the experience of replacing my turquoise encrusted apple ring for the 4th or 5th time, just like every time.

Some people stay where they grew up, and some move away. I was forced to leave, and I didn't want to, and I was lucky enough to come back to CF for this visit, and loved it. Some people get to continue to see their piano teachers, babysitters, old coaches and former teachers, and their lives are richer because of it. While I'm not given that luxury, I don't mind as much anymore. I realize that I have my own memories of everyone and they've largely forgotten me, so perhaps there is no point.

So, this weekend, I took stock of what has changed for me:
1) The old swimming pool. It's covered in grass and trees now, largely vanished. Alisha and I spent most of our 14th summer there. I recall the silly things we did, searching for an extra nickel for an extra jolly rancher, following the ridiculous kid around with the green snorkeling kit, searching for reasonably cute boys, who were not there. I remember wondering if I'd EVER get a boyfriend, if I'd EVER become pretty, like everyone else, and wonder what else I could possibly do to be thinner. The pool has been replaced by a bigger one, with infinite water slides, water drops/splashes, a high dive, a regular diving board, a drop slide, karaoke, and it costs $6.00 for entrance. 6 DOLLARS? I used to go for $1.25. So I took full advantage of this pool, mostly by using the high platform (got stuck at the end in intense fear!), I DOVE off of the springboard diving board, a very rare occurrence. I slid down the 4 foot drop slide and plunged into 12 foot water, and I played a bunch with my friend's kids. They're adorable and still learning how to swim and the concept of holding their breath underwater is still foreign. I still remember how bravely Jade plunged through the water at the old pool, my little sister fish.

Children, I'm not sure I want them. I like playing with my friend's kids, but the full-time commitment they bring does not elicit joy for me. Perhaps I will never really be ready for them. I have become OK with this. Sacrifice was never for me, Jesus Christ, I am not.

Anyway, I went to the town festival and suddenly realized how many Victorian houses Cedar Falls has. (LOVE IT!) We drank beer, which would make my husband proud, and I began the intricate and impossible work of an old friendship and it's disrepair or confusion. We hadn't seen each other at all for 3.5 years. And suddenly, we were interacting. What can one do? I chose to ride the upside down galleon carnival ride. Mine really had duct tape holding part of the cage together. I went in anyway. 7 minutes later, I realized I had no idea what up or down and that my stomach was not, in fact, located in my left ear. My skirt flew up about 90 times and I was caught in the beautiful-up-side down view of downtown Cedar Falls. I tried to remember it, for posterity. Perhaps the other riders found it as beautiful as I did. Iowa holds many secrets.

Slept and awakened, courtesy of MIke Drahaus. His life is very different now, and that's a good thing. It's weird to see what people make of their lives. They become small town celebrities, masters in martial arts, and it's beautiful. I live an anonymous life in the city, wishing for recognition, and someone goes out and just does it. Power, power. Everyone in Iowa was whitebread, so few hipsters. I didn't feel out of place at all, I just wished I was thinner.

My cousin got married in the Strayer-wood Theatre. It's another place where I used to be, where I watched the play "noises off" and laughed my ass off, and had a few introductory theater experiences. It was a beautiful wedding though. She's my stepcousin, I guess, and we aren't yet close. I'd love to get to know her better. I can't really say which bride she was most like, but it was gorgeous, and I cried during her wedding. Hearing someone soar over the musical notes "At last" with bravado and gusto can do that to you! Then we danced and danced and danced and there was karaoke and more drinking and I loved it.

Weekends like this make life worth living. Coming home to my husband and our house after a weekend away makes life even richer. I sometimes wonder how I got so lucky to live this long and I wonder why more people don't hurl themselves from the high dive, dance like no one really is watching, propel themselves upside down and giggle the entire time.

I had a dream there's a boat that I own

20' Yamaha LS 2000

Yes, please.

Looking for someone to go halfsies on this. Totally worth it:

http://www.yachtworld.com/core/listing/pl_boat_detail.jsp?&units=Feet&id=2228252&lang=en&slim=broker&&hosturl=doublediamond&&ywo=doublediamond

walked 2 miles, ran 1.5 (lame, but I'm trying to improve my speed, not my distance)

Lifted a bunch of weight, could barely walk up the stairs to my house.

And survived.

what if I punched you?

In the face?

Saturday, 2 people told me that I looked like I'd lost about 10 lbs. The first person made me want to hug them and I grinned for 2 minutes.

The second person made me want to punch them and I spent 2 minutes trying to not listen to words that were coming out of her mouth.

Nonetheless, Saturday rocked.

Perfect Saturday, indeed

Well, all of what I said about not getting a dessert didn't happen. Oops! I drank 2 glasses of wine, had bread, ate 1/5 of my entree and returned the rest to Dan. I think I ordered the thai chicken or something. Peanut sauce does it for me every time.

Yesterday was an awesome day. We started with trash: I babysat the leaf/brush dumpster with Gene while poor Dan unloaded a bunch of bulky item trashy things from our basement. Goodbye, old storm windows, futon mattress, old wrapping paper, paper bags full of paper bags, and miscellaneous crap we're not planning on using...EVER.

That ended, it thunderstormed, so instead of watching a World Cup game at the Power and Light, we went to a Tivoli movie with Catherine Keener called "Just Give." Talked about Toy Story 3, but that was a bit too light for us and talked about "Winter's Bone", but that was a bit too dark. This movie was great, but there's a pretty sad scene about a grandmother that dies which is a bit hard to handle given all of the death lately. As we were leaving, we ran into some neighbors who did see "Winter's Bone." I guess it's quite suspenseful, very good, but it makes you never want to visit rural MO. ;)

Left the theatre, went to GLACE ice cream. YUUUMMMM. You can sample 3 of their funky flavors, so I had peanut butter & jelly, venezuelan chocolate and Caramel de Sol. And there's still 1/2 of it in the freezer, waiting for me.

Then we went home, walked over to Holmes street for Party with a Purpose. It's an AIDS fundraiser and it was the first time I'd been. 3 houses had their first floors open. They're all great houses and one is on the tour this fall for all 3 floors. I mean, stunning houses, with built in wine refigerators, circular stair cases, A-MAZE-ING glasswork. The house with the best glass pretty much knocked me out while I was standing at the front door. The house is for sale. My guess was 390K, but it's listed at 437K. Oops. Anyway, the party was cool. Lots of good neighbors, some political whos-who, and some wine. It's so hot outside, I really can't imagine eating or drinking at all, but it worked.

Bess and Jim called us at the same time we called them, so we went to the dog park. It was Skye's first trip and she did quite well. Then we had MORE food back at B&J's house. I definitely over think some things sometimes, but I'm hoping it turns out OK in the end.

Cheesecake Factory

I haven't been there in at least 5 years, but tonight I will sign off of work, dress nicely, walk to the plaza, make a reservation for 17 people and sit, drinking water, crunching on lettuce and wait for an hour or so for all 17 people to arrive.

There will be no cheesecake for me, nor desserts of other kind, nor sweet martinis, for I am on the quest to prove that people are happier when thinner.

The last time I was there was before the stock split, before the unsplit shares were just 3 or 4 dollars per share. For some reason, I have an idyllic memory of driving to Des Moines, going to Olive Garden, watching my friends drink an entire bottle, watching them buy more, drinking it in the car, laughing with Dan, driving over to Cheesecake factory because we were still hungry for dessert after eating Italian and shopping for books. Yes! I do want a 9 dollar martini! YES! I do want a dessert or 2 to share with my friends. No, I don't care that it's 11 pm and I work at 8 tomorrow and still have to drive home for an hour. No, I don't care about gaining weight. Yes, my cute clothes still fit!

Anyway, tonight's little meeting should be OK. I've seen my coworkers more than I expected in the last few weeks. Last night, I met with the Jackson County legislator candidates and the candidates for our district of State Senate. One person thought the biggest problems facing our neighborhood was check cashing stores and pawn shops. Then he later said that gay and lesbians aren't good role models for children in foster care. I love hearing shocked gasps and seeing indignant faces in the crowd. We are perhaps, not used to hearing an honest opinion from a politician.

I guess we have to give him credit for being honest, but I'm guessing 0 people in the room agreed with him.

As long as there are no gasps of horror and shock in the work meeting tonight, all will be well.

WEnt back to IA for the weekend. In my alternate reality, I dove into the lake, swam 5 yards before I surfaced, water glistening and swam around in heaven. In actual reality, I climbed in with a life jacket on. It felt great. At first it was cold, but after the first few minutes, the water is really heaven. Much clearer than normal, few boats were out. I skied and tubed. My sister couldn't come because she as at work and Dan couldn't make it because his mom is recovering from a concussion and needed some help. Not as much fun without him, but DJ Steve came, too, and was able to get up on skis on his first try--though he has skied several times in the past, it's been a few years.

Marilynne Robinson DID come

And I was there to see her. And ask a question.
She read a passage of Housekeeping that I wasn't familiar with, having not read that section of the book yet. When I got to it, I read it, then pondered, and reread it. Here it is:
Imagine a Carthage sown with salt, and all the sowers gone, and the seeds lain however long in the earth, till there rose finally in vegetable protrusion leaves and trees of rime and brine. What flowering would there be in such a garden? Light would force each salt calyz to open in prisms, and to fruit heavily with bright globes of water--peaches and grapes are little more than that, and where the world was salt there would be greater need of slaking. For need can blossom into all the compensation it requires. To crave and to have are as like a a thing and its shadow. For when does a berry break upon the tongue as sweetly as when one longs to taste it, and when is the taste refracted into so many hues and savors of ripeness and earth, and when do our senses know anything so utterly as when we lack it. And here again is a foreshadowing--the world will be made whole. For to wish for a hand on one's hair is all but to feel it. So whatever we may lose, very craving gives it back to us again. Though we dream and hardly know it, longing, like an angel, fosters us, smooths our hair, and brings us wild strawberries.

Portland

Portland was great. Looking at our photos makes me sad that we're back. The room was a suite in a central part of downtown, with a beautiful view and a great king sized bed. We went with really nice friends, met more friends of ours there, ate lobsters, oysters, donuts de Voodoo, and some other restaurant that I can't remember.
We bought books and idolized Powell's, saw the most beautiful water falls and scenery ever, visited the Chinese Gardens, toured the city, saw the bar that our friend just opened, finally met Darryl, played and drank at an arcade/bar, ate Bulkogi at a food cart, and best of all, went Whitewater Rafting.

In the end, I determined that I'm not really interested in living in Portland for life. It would be a nice change of pace and was reassuring that the suburbs even cater to pedestrians, just like the city does, but there were far too many homeless people wandering the streets and I'm pretty sure that we'd never be able to buy a house there, and in the end, it would probably just be too far from family. Plus, I hate to say this, but our art museum is better than theirs. Of course, the Portland exhibit didn't have any temporary exhibits while we were there, and I will say that their R. Crumb comic exhibit of Genesis is something I'd definitely go to see.

Anyway, here are some great photos from the trip.